Happy Birthday Sweet Boy!

I can not believe it is already the end ofOctober. I apologize for not updating sooner but I have been without a computer for the last week or so due to a deadcharger, gotta love computers. This month has been a good one I try to keep myself as busy as possible to due this month’s significance. Kyle and I made a weekend trip to Nashville with friends and had a blast, the food was great and I have to say that watching my husband ride a mechanical bull was the highlight of my weekend. I always knew I had a cowboy somewhere in there. Mom and Dad were gracious enough to keep Maddie Grace for us and she even went down to Tallahassee to stay with my sister and her family and had a great time. We had a few teary phone calls but all in all she was great, I think I had a harder time than she did although she was very ready to see me on Sunday and could not wait to see her daddy. On Tuesday we went to a luncheon for my dad, he is the Georgia Farmer of the Year. They announced that day who won the national at the Expo, and although dad didn’t win, even though anyone that knows him and how much he has done for agriculture knows that he should have won and needs no award to prove that although I am sure it would have been great. We did get to take Maddie Grace to the pumpkin patch this past weekend it was packed and cold, but she loves it every year, the hayride, cow ride (don’t ask), pig races ( yes you are reading correctly) and of course the petting zoo and patch.

She was very concerned that all of the pumpkins would be gone. Funny story that night I was not feeling well and Kyle grilled steak and corn to go along with a few other things I had for supper. Maddie Grace had eaten a few bites and about 10 bites in she started crying and ran over to me. I was very confused thought maybe she had bitten her tongue but she had actually bitten down and made her front tooth pretty loose. I guess the movement and the fact that she has not lost a tooth so she did know what that feeling was freaked her out. We tried to clam her by telling her how great it was and that when she lost it the tooth fairy would bring her money for her tooth under her pillow, well that made it worse and she made it clear that she didn’t want any fairy under her pillow and could she just put it on the bedside table. Kyle and I got a good laugh out of that, she has since really enjoyed having her first loose tooth and grosses me out by pushing it back and forth, yuck!!! I do not have much to report as far as fertility goes but hope to have good news this month.

As most of you already know our sweet Zach’s birthday is Saturday, Halloween, he would have been 2 this year; which means it has been a year and a half since he has been gone. We miss him so much and no matter how much time has passed that pain remains unchanged. It is hard to imagine what he would be like at 2 when he died so young and so small. I am trying to remember the sweet little boy we had for that short period of time. When all you have are a few videos, pictures and short memories you can become afraid that you will forget his little smile or his smell. We thought at 2 we would be chasing a little boy who had his sister’s dolls and keeping him in his toddler bed, but we don’t get to do that. Things that as mom’s we do not always like, but we would take every tough moment every time out for us or him just to have him here. So to my sweet Zach we love you and although we know that you have seen things in heaven that we can not imagine and you are whole and you are happy, we know that you are home which makes us homesick for you. You are our angel that we think about every hour and that will not ever change. We have and continue to learn so much from you and cant wait to hold you again one day. We love you.