Back to the hosptial, it never ends.

This has been a week to say the least. Monday I was not feeling great but not horrible either, by Monday night things went in a really BAD direction. I got very sick very fast and by the time I got to the hospital I was severely dehydrated, to the point they could not get an IV started, I am usually very easy, veins stick out. The doctors were concerned at first about me going into labor I only had a few contractions though which eased their concern after I started getting fluids and I am slowly but surly starting to eat again, very little at the time but I am doing much better with fluids. I finally was let go yesterday (Thursday) and I am so glad to be home. Although, I am still feeling pretty rough, it is always better at home.
Maddie Grace had a really hard time with me being in the hospital, bless her heart she really has been through it all and by the time Kyle picked her up from school yesterday before they could get back to the hospital to get me she was asleep in the car, she was emotionally and physically exhausted. And without my mom coming all the way up here to help and a few of our friends we would really be lost. And since it is baseball season, my poor husband is being pulled in more directions than anyone could stand. And let me just say how lucky I know that I am to have him. Being a coaches wife is not always easy, but he really does the best he can to make sure that Maddie Grace and I are first.
So, I think at this point we all wish we could blink our eyes and May would be here. The constant worry and hospital visits are beginning to wear on us all and although we are all very excited about Samuel joining our family the emotions for all of us are hard to swallow and we know even after our precious boy is here emotions will still run high. We laughed at the hospital the other night, when Kyle and I were talking, God really has faith in us that we obviously do not completely understand. Our lives have not been easy over the past 3 years, but blessed none the less and with the anniversary of Zach's death just around the corner, the anticipation is a bit much. Please keep us in your prayers as you all have been so wonderful to do, as we also pray for a pregnancy that for the next few weeks is a complete bore

Safe and Holding, for now.

I had the surgery to stop the problems with my cervix, and the doctor was very pleased, a beautiful stitch as he put it although I didn't see it, the beautiful part that is. I have had a few issues since then but nothing too serious, I am doing alot of work and sitting in the chair, work meaning, my job from the den in a chair, which is a blessing. My issue is my cervix was funneling meaning it was opening from the inside, allowing the amniotic sac to funnel down into the cervix, not good and very dangerous, increasing the risk of the my water breaking early. When I went in this past Friday although it is still open with the cerclage it will prevent it from opening more and hopefully allowing me to carry Samuel to more healthy point in the pregnancy. This is the week Zach was born during my pregnancy with him and anxiety, seems to get the better of me this week as each day passes although I feel so much better so much more cared for and being watched so closely does ease my mind some. We did keep everything about my surgery from Maddie Grace to be honest I do not believe that she can handle anything else, as far as she knows mommy had tests and had to stay over night , you could tell she was very uncomfortable and look up when we walked out to the huge windows above the labor and delivery to see the NICU, yeah I know probably the worst layout for a NICU possible, just what you want to see when you have a sick baby is all of the healthy babies below.
We had a nice snow fall on Friday night and Saturday Maddie Grace loved playing in it for hours on end, and she was lucky enough to be entertained by a few of Kyles baseball players, she was having a blast that is until I looked out the window and saw one of them with her in the air in front of them using her as a human shield, they knew that hitting her with snowball, was a no no especially with Coach by them so when they wanted a break they used her. And of course she loved every minute. I did find out today that I do have an infection that they caught very early so I am on round 2 of antibiotics, to protect both of us. We have been so blessed already with my mom and sister coming up to help when I had surgery, cooking, taking care of MG and just supporting us and Kyle, who needs it as much if not more than me. Then our friends, who have brought us food, checked in on us and make sure daily that I am following my bedrest rules, (some more than others HA!!) Baseball season has started and is very hard on Kyle to leave us but I know it is somewhat of a relief to know that we have people surrounding us at the drop of a hat. Samuel James Kirk will be here before we know it and we are so excited and feel so blessed and pray that he will stay safe inside for a few more months.

What a day!!!

Today has been, well a day. I had my usual weekly appointment with the perinatologist, I went in thinking everything was great and there were no problems, after 2hrs of the doctor looking and checking everything, things were not great. Samuel is good however he is growing, kicking and doing all of things that a baby this far along should be doing. I am not doing great though apparently, my cervix has now decided that it has a mind of its own and apparently is not holding our precious Samuel in place as it should. So after meeting with the doctor he recommended that I have a cerclage, and honestly at this point I would do anything including standing on my head to make sure this baby stay right where he should be until it is a safe time for him to join us. So tomorrow I will go in for surgery and if everything goes well I should be able to go home on Saturday. My surgery is a little different being that I am a good bit further along than most patients when they have this done. But we know that God is in control and that he will protect baby Samuel and hopefully keep me from going completely insane in the process. As if that was not enough for today after spending all morning and afternoon at the hospital I got home to make sure I was here for Maddie Grace after school. The afternoon was fine, homework, snack, etc.. Until she came out from mine and Kyle's bathroom with her children's scissors in hand, saying look mom I wanted bangs. I think every bit of color must have left my face and I felt sick, not only had she cut herself, SHORT bang, she had cut hunks out of other parts of her hair. What makes child do this is beyond me. But after an emergency run to the salon Maddie Grace is the proud owner of a bob with bangs, and although it will take some getting use to is actually pretty cute, I could have dealt with the short bob a lot better with out the bangs and without all the emotion of the day. But as my sweet husband says, honey it is just another memory to look back on.
We had enjoyed a great month of January before all of this, we had a girls weekend in Atlanta, me, my mom, sister, nieces and Maddie Grace we went to see "Annie" at the Fox which was great and then enjoyed a trip out to the American Girl store, it was lots of fun. And of course baseball started this week as well adding to all of the mess. Please keep us in your prayers, and as soon as possible I will post pictures of our sweet Maddie Grace and her new do.